


Small Sparks Still Light Up The Night-sky

by ivegotthekittens



Category: Football RPF
Genre: German National Team, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-25
Updated: 2015-03-12
Packaged: 2018-03-15 06:14:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3436547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivegotthekittens/pseuds/ivegotthekittens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Manuel Neuer and Christoph Kramer are simply teammates who get along well and enjoy each other's company. That's all they are; until they aren't. </p>
<p>[taken place in Brazil WC'10]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, boring thank you part…. First of – thank you to my BETA (not sure if, or how, you'd like to be acknowledged here, but you know who you are : ). Then, I have to thank my Neumer anon/s, who helped me come up with my beloved headcanon for this pairing and brought me much enjoyment and entertainment.  
> I also have to thank Isana and Anne, my partners in crime. This one is specially dedicated to them cause this was the first (and maybe) only ship we all agree on, which must mean it's IRL. Love you guys <3.

Manuel wishs he could say it was just about sex. But it wasn't, never. It wasn't about love as well, he wouldn' t say so, never. There were no butterflies in his stomach or sleepless nights. It was just, Christoph, he was there and… 

No, that sounds bad, too bad even in his own mind and Manuel has to shake his head to force the thought away. He wants to remember it correctly because right now Christoph is so many miles away, at the other end of the country, both in horizontal and vertical line. He's just so far away, yet Manuel can't stop thinking about him.

It wasn't supposed to have happened. Manuel doesn't regret it, he would never say so. But being in the closet is hard enough even when you're not in love, though he wasn't in love now. No, he can't be, it cannot happen. 

Christoph was, is, everything he had never looked for in a partner. He was tall, well built; he had never, not even for once, looked like a lad in distress, a boy in need of guidance, of a savior. Yet Manuel was somehow drawn to him from the start. 

There was this calmness to him, the other new ones, the young ones, they were getting along fine from the very start as well. The team was welcoming and wanting them to integrate as quickly as possible. But it was like Christoph didn't need any help. Still, out of both curiosity and genuine care, Manuel came to sit by him during water break at training, still back at South Tyrol, and asked how he was doing. And so, they started chatting, and just simply never stopped.

They kept discovering more and more things they both liked, kept discovering how easy it was to talk to each other, to enjoy each other's company. They enjoyed it so much, that by the time they arrived to Brazil it was obvious to everyone these two would be sharing bench seats on the bus. 

Then came the playlists. The first one was a surprise; later Christoph would admit it was a bit planned, but whether it was or not, it felt very natural, like this is how it was supposed to go. On the plane to Brazil, a red-eye which found them tired yet excited. Manuel tried to sleep but his eyes kept opening every other minute or so. That's when Christoph suggested they'd share headphone. Manuel fell asleep within minutes, and woke up to find Christoph's sleeping head has fallen just slightly on to his shoulder. Still coming down from his dream, with the plane so dim and quite, Manuel had a tentative urge to kiss the top of the younger's head, just a soft gesture, but instead he reached his hand to his ear and pulled out his earphone, placing is gently onto Christoph's. As a result, or simply as a coincident, Christoph then shifted his head to the other side, resting it nearly on the window frame. Manuel could almost feel the emptiness left at the side of his neck.

And then, then came Bastian. Bastian and Thomas. It was still early in the morning, but an unplanned meet-up on the way to breakfast was enough to make them enter the dining room together, giggling and playfully shoving each other as they reminiscent about the night before as if it wasn't just hours since Christoph had sang for them on the boat. Bastian and Thomas called them to come over and sit at their table. Manuel saw them exchange a look, and then Thomas winked at him, yet he was puzzled over it, wondering if he was supposed to know what it was all about. 

It wasn't until Christoph rose and went to the bathroom that Bastian had revealed the secret. 

"So…" he said, a mischievous smile on his face "Christoph….!" 

"So " Manuel shrugged his shoulders, "what about him?"

"Come on Manu,"

"Yeah, don't play dumb" Thomas joined in with a mouth full of scrambled eggs. 

"We get along well, very well." 

"He has so many hearts in his eyes whenever he looks at you, it's fucking gross man!" Thomas ended his sentences with a big gulp of milk and a wink. Bastian shot him a look to say he's not actually helping.

"Yeah well, he does. And it's not just him." Thomas had to have the last word. 

Bastian shook his head, half a smile on his face as he returned his eyes to Manuel,"I've never seen you this way." Bastian was staring right into Manuel's eyes " Your face, that smile of yours. Not even when we won the Champions League." Manuel needed a moment to take in what had this been side, but Bastian did not grant him that. "Benni says that not since Ivan left did you…"

"You talked to Benni about it?!"

"He talked to us" Bastian made sure to make it clear, "he seemed to really care about this."

"Why?"

"I don't know." rejoined the conversation the conversation, "go ask him!" 

Manuel was definitely going to do so, he was ready in fact, right at that moment, to get up and, leave the table, go address and put a stop to it all just there and then. If only Christoph hadn't just returned to his seat

"They had these chocolate mini-cupcakes. They look really good so I got you one." 

Manuel waited a second; his gaze fixed on Bastian and Thomas with their smug smirks, before he finally turned to Christoph and accepted the offered sweet. 

"Thanks," was all he said, yet it seemed to have been sufficient for Christoph, who set sat down and somehow managed not to lose even a bit of his smile while devouring the cake with almost one bite. 

XXX

Training that day turned out to be even more frustrating than usual, at least for Manuel. Every ball that went pass him he wanted to through back into the scorer's face. He was almost about to, as right before they were about to be finished with the 5 a-side he conceded without even noticing a ball coming towards his goal. He angrily grabbed it from the back of the net and was about to throw it back as hard as he could towards his teammates when he saw the high-fived exchanged between Christoph and Andre, followed by Christoph awkward wink aimed no doubly at him. He ended up simply passing the ball to Philip, putting so little strength into the kick the captain had to run a bit towards him to receive the ball. 

_He needed to talk to Benni._

Manuel tried to find a way to get him alone without raising attention , and finally managed to do so in the evening as they all set down to watch Brazil take on Mexico. 

Benni was sitting alone in a two-sit sofa, with no Mats or Julian in sight. Christoph was also on his own, right at the other side of the room, and Manuel could feel the blue eyes following him across the room until he took his sit, very close to the loud speaker who should protect them from being heard. 

"You talked to Bastian about me and Christoph."

"It came up," his former teammate answered without removing his eyes from the screen.

Manuel reached into the popcorn box on the other's lap and took a few.

"Just came up?"

"Yeah," Benni smiled, and his expression of surprised gave away that was sure he'd find his friend smiling as well. As he didn't, Benni turned his face back to the screen, yet from his voice it was evident, they were done with smiles and cheerful tones. "Come on, you two are so obvious."

"You have no right…" Manuel turned his gaze to his lap, crossing his arms, "I mean, you could have at least talk to me about it first."

"Manu, I know you. I've seen you before," despite the fact Benni had turned to him again, Manuel still wouldn't meet his eyes. "I know you'd refuse to acknowledge it. But you need to, this is something real and I just…"

"Just because we really like each other doesn’t mean anything, you and Mats…"

"We're not gay" Benni was getting angry, turning to look at the screen yet clearly not interested in the game, "and we're not you." 

They both fell silent, oblivious to the shouts and grunts of the team mates around them who were tuned to the drama on the screen. 

"I'm just worried about you, ok?" Benni finally said softly, "both of you."

Manuel gave a sarcastic laugh which he himself didn't believe to be real. "You really think my friendship with Christoph is going to hurt the team-spirit."

"This is not about hurting the team-spirit, this is about you hurting." Every muscle in Manuel's body stiffened "’cause it's not a friendship."

They held each other's gaze at the heavy, tensed silence between them was absorbed by the cheers of their teammates, all of them unaware of what had just happened right under their noses. All but one, whose blue eyes once again followed Manuel across the room, though this time as he was making his way out.


	2. chapter 2

They went hopeful and optimistic on to the pitch against the USA, and stepped off worried. It wasn't because of the result itself, they were top of the group and moving on to the final 16, but because it could easily remind them of 2010. Winning first match 4-0, then a second match where they failed to deliver (at least this time they didn't lose, but just barely) and then a hard-fought win in the last match.

Manuel was thankful for having the new guys around at that moment. Mario, Toni, Benni, Julian – he knew their talent first hand. And yet the others seemed to have given him even more hope, as no one could know how far they could take themselves, use their talent to surprise not only the opponent but their own team. Erik, Mustafi, Christoph – their existence eased his mind. So much, he found himself day dreaming, his hazy gaze pointed at just a blank wall.

"Hi goali!" Christoph brought him back to reality by throwing a pen cap at him. His smile was so wide, Manuel kept wondering how come he never got tired of it, of being happy. 

It was simply impossible for him not to reply the smile. He got up, picked up the cap from the floor, walked over and just dropped himself next to Christoph, all the ways he could come up with to describe Christoph's smile were so cliché, he was almost ashamed to even just think them., but it hopelessly drawn Manuel was drawn to that boy sitting with his back to the sofa's hand-rest cushions, his journal lying open on his crossed legs, both pages empty. 

Manuel didn't even give a thought to his hand coming to rest of the other's knee, "not writing anything tonight?"

"Nah," Christoph shook his head and took the offered cap, his finger briefly touched those of Manuel, who tried to ignore the shiver that went through his spine. "I don't know, we're up to the next stage and it's amazing on one hand, but for me, all three games where the same, basically."

"Maybe that what you should write about." It was a bad advice, and he was sorry even before Christoph sighed and threw the pen and notebook on to the side table. "I'm sorry, that was not the right thing to say." 

"It's okay," Christoph seemed to have withdrawn into himself, "I know what my role is and I'm happy to play it, really. It's a team right, we win as a team."

"Yes," Manuel tapped his knee once, then again, "we are. And, it's not easy on anyone. I got three goals past me, it's only three goals but…"

"It can take just one to lose a match" Christoph has finished the mantra they both heard many times.

In the silence that followed they did not look at each other, but Manuel's hand still rested on the other's leg and he was sure he could feel his pulse. 

"Hi!" Christoph once again demanded his attention "let's go to the beach."

"The beach?"

"Yeah, it would do you good."

"What? Now?" Christoph nodded, biting his bottom lip, but Manuel had to say no. 

"We, we can't. You know that. Not at this hour and without guards."

"Oh come on, what would they actually do to you? Big , star goalie..."

"Well, what about you?"

"It would just be fun, like a little adventure" Those big blue eyes of Christoph's suddenly had a cheeky twinkle in them, and he was staring right into Manuel's. He should have said no – but how could he? 

XXX

Outwitting the guards didn't prove to be too difficult, especially not with Manuel's experience of sneaking into stadiums after receiving his ban.

The beach was beautiful, stars so bright above them just like the ones that night on the ferry. Without words, just a touch and a look, Christoph took hold of Manuel's arm and started leading him towards the water. 

"Hi, hi" Manuel had enough strength to stop the other, pull him back towards him. They stood there in front of each other, and somehow Christoph's hand ended up in Manuel's palm. Neither released the grip. 

Manuel's other hand came to rest on Christoph's cheek, the other's gaze was turned up, over Manuel's eyes, towards the stars and the moon.

Manuel had no clue what he was doing, but the stars and the smells of the sea and the heavy, calm breaths of Christoph- everything seemed to fit, everything seem to be exactly what he needed without intending to ever ask for. 

"You'll get your chance, I know you will," Christoph brought his gaze down, and their eyes magnetized onto each other's. Christoph seemed to him like he has been waiting for this moment, expecting it even, "It can take just 10 minutes to make your mark." 

They kept standing there, staring at each other. There seemed to be only one way to bring this to a closure, to not leave themselves hanging in mid-air, but neither dared to move even one inch.

"We should," Christoph finally said and cleared his thought, "we should get back"

Christoph didn't wait for approval; but his movements were slow. He turned around, Manuel released his grip and his hand simply slid away as if it was never there for more than a blink of an eye.

XXX

Shirt, towel and water bottle in hand, Manuel made his way towards his teammates who were already huddled in the centre of the pitch, ready to celebrate what was yet another narrow win, but one that took them forwards to the quarter final. Christoph was just a few steps in front of him, having joined them for the last 20 minutes of the match. Manuel called out to him, reached out his hand, Christoph caught his eyes and returned the gesture. They barely touched and hadn't said anything to each other, not in words.


	3. chapter 3

There was alcohol, chats, music… even some sing-a-longs. Yet it wasn't really a party, just a weird kind of celebration, since they have achieved something, a landmark you could say, yet it was just another beginning. 

They had made it to the semi-finals, they knew it was the minimum expected of them, anything below that would've been seen as a failure. So now they had to pull it together, they had to stay strong in their heads as well as body and had to prove to the world they are the best of the best. 

Though all the cheers and the hugs shared by them was about how they already did, Germany was the first nation to made it to the semi-final in 4 consecutive world cups. In a way, it can be seen as an honour of no less importance then the world cup itself. That trophy, the World Cup title, was the achievement of a moment – at this point and time you were the best.   
But breaking records, proving your worth time and time again, being consistence in being good even if not the best – that has to be what really puts you above the others and speaks about your great talent and hard work. And it was going to continue this way, they were all sure of it. And they wanted to celebrate that. 

So more beers were opened, and somehow the assorted music tastes of all teammates combined into a descent party playlist. Lukas was at the corner talking with Per and Bastian, all of them laughing as they tried to figure out who was responsible for The Backstreet Boys being blasted off the hotel's bar speakers. 

"Aren't you all too young to know it?" One of them called out to Mario, Andre, Erik, Ron-Robert… all of them who were dancing, even if awkwardly like Manuel.

He looked up for just a second and caught Christoph standing at the door way. He smiled at him, gesturing him with his hand to join them. No matter how self-conscious Christoph was about his moves, he couldn't have looked worse on the dance floor than Thomas, who was right there next to Manuel flapping his arms, spinning in place, stamping his feet, nearly falling over from laughter. 

"Nah," Christoph mouthed and shook his head (Manuel never knew a "no" could be so soft and full of warmth), and gestured to Manuel to come over to him. 

"Hi, what's up?" he asked, already a bit tipsy, "I thought you'd like this song." 

His hands caught each side of Christoph hips, moving him along to the rhythm as well as he could keep up with it.

"I just… wanted to talk to you." Christoph said and walked to the hallway, Manuel followed him until the music and laughter of their teammates turned to echoes. 

"Christoph?" he called out, unsure of what he was pulled away from the party, even worried a little bit.

"I just wanted to say thanks. Thank you." 

"What for?" 

They were standing so close, but it didn't seem weird. They didn't pay it the attention they probably would have just a couple of week ago. 

"Believing in me. Being on the pitch even for just the last few minutes." He looked up, Manuel got so familiar with this position, with that look and that smile and that spark. "I don't ever wanna forget it, any minute of it."

"You deserve it" Manuel nudged him with his elbow, "and next time, next world cup, it will be even better." 

Manuel took him in his arms, tight and heartfelt. 

"You deserve it," he said again, "you earned it," he added as he broke the hug.

"Yes," Christoph said, their hands still holding the other close, "I know". 

It was a short pause, the kind that can later on seem either a few seconds long or endless minutes, but at the end of it Christoph's lips has met Manuel's. 

As Christoph pulled back, Manuel except to see a surprised look on his face. But when he opened his eyes it was just that smile again, calm, so assured of himself. But Manuel said nothing, just stared, and Christoph's confidence seemed to have shaken.

"I just, I'm sorry if… I just thought."

"Yeah," was all Manuel was able to say, eyes locked on Christoph's lips to make sure he gets the words right. His ears were ringing. The party seemed far away yet the sounds and beats have taken over his senses. 

"I didn't get it wrong, did I?"

Manuel should've said no, but how could he.

"No," it came out so soft, so weak, "No you didn't."

He could feel the air getting thinner, losing the tension he had charged it with.

"So can I kiss you again?" 

"Yes," Manuel giggled, "Yes, you definitely can."

They closed the distance between them together, eyes closed so they could feel more. Christoph's hands cradled Manuel's neck, keeping him close, giving their tongues more freedom. Manuel's hands closed behind Christoph's back, lining their bodies against each other. They only stopped to quickly get some air, and switch sides. 

Manuel could have gone on for hours. They were right, his mind was screaming at him, they were all right – Bastian and Thomas and Benni. There was something there, something more than just friendship, something that had been developing for a fair while now and Manuel had no clue what to make of it. He wanted to, needed to, before it's too late and he won't be able to stop himself. But Christoph has indeed managed to shut up his mind with that kiss. 

"Come on," Manuel said. He started walking and pulled Christoph after him by his hand. They quickly made it past the door to the bar, where the party was going on just as strong, led by Bastian and Lukas' karaoke of Umbrella. 

They made it to Manuel's hotel room unnoticed, as far as they could tell, by either the staff or the players. Manuel managed the card-key out of his pocket, which wasn't as easy as usual seeing as Christoph was pressing into his back and giggling right next to his ear. The shivers made the small hair on his neck stand. 

They finally made it inside, the weight of Christoph's push making them tumble rather than walk into the room. Laughing, Manuel took a few quick steps to avoid falling over his own feet. As he turned around, Christoph had just closing the door behind him. He half turned towards Manuel, catching his eyes with the easiest soft smile. Manuel started making his way towards him, small and quite steps, Christoph's leaned on the door in anticipation, hand already reaching to rest on Manuel's chest. 

"You want this, right?" Christoph asked. He was no lad in distress, not a naïve boy in need of guidance. He knew what he was doing probably better than Manuel. 

"Yes, yes of course" Manuel breathed out, want quickly taking over him. "You?"

"Are you kidding me?" Christoph stroke that short blond hair at the base of Manuel's neck, "Yes, God, I wanted this for such a long time

"Really?" Manuel raised an eyebrow, his fingers finding their ways in between Christoph's hair strands as well. "Since when?"

"Since that night, on the bought, when you sang with me." Manuel hammed in agreement, anticipation. "Wait, no. It was before that. On the plane with the playlist I made us and wasn’t sure how you'd accept and…. Well, I probably made that playlist in the first place since…"

Manuel's body shook with laughter, infectious, one that Christoph had to join in. "Yeah, I don't know probably," he said and the intensity in his eyes spellbound Manuel, "but I do want this. A lot. I want you, Manu."

Manuel knew no man who could've said no to that. And so he didn't. 

He tried to pick up Christoph in his arms, as he was used to doing to others before. He failed yet somehow they managed to fall only when they got to the bed, working on each other's jeans zippers, shirts already lost somewhere along the way.

I t was at that moment that Manuel started to discover there were advantages to not having such a huge height difference. There was so much skin to touch and kiss, so much more body to be in contact with. And the kisses, the kisses had so much ease to them, as he could really expend on top of the other and just lose himself. 

Though, He knew from that start, from even before they had no fabric to separate them, that that wasn't just down to Christoph being as tall as he was. This was also about Christoph just being himself, as he is. 

Thinking of it now, maybe that's what it was. It was easy, not the bad way – the good way. It felt right, everything – the pace, the touches; all the soft moan and giggles they shared that night. Every look, every smile, seemed like it could've been written, directed specifically for them and that moment.

Christoph came so beautifully lying under him, his hands above his head, encouraging Manuel to touch him more, to never stop – and he never wanted to. He came just a short time after, his moans buried in Christoph's neck, his chest pressed closely by the other's embrace, and this time he knew for sure he was feeling the other's heart beats. 

Manuel was still coming down from his orgasm, breathing heavily, smelling the mixture of sweat and desire and relief which filled the room. Christoph's stroke his temple, seeking eye contact and didn't stop even after he got it.

"Can I stay the night?"

"What?" Manuel chuckled, "this isn't my house."

"You know what I mean." Christoph voice was weak and sleepy, "Can I sleep here…with you?"

Manuel hoped his eyes looked as soft as he intended them to, "of course you can," he said and kissed Christoph on his forehead. 

Manuel was scared he won't be able to fall asleep that night. There was much to think of, so many questions which has been pushed aside by the force of Christoph's kisses. And now also, his calming deep breathes, the slow moment of his chest cradled by Manuel's arm. It was not possible for him to dwell on anything but one thought - they were right, he was right, Benni. This is was no friendship, it was something he had to acknowledge, something that could very possible get one of them hurt if he didn't stop it in time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [thanks to everyone commenting and/or kudoing. Your support means a lot to me even if I can't find the time to reply right now. I will eventually. 2 more chapters to go! :) ]


	4. chapter 4

Days passed by, and it went on. Of course it did. Cause Christoph was there, always. It sounds bad, but it wasn't. It was casual, natural even. 

Christoph just had to give him a look, a smile while passing him down the hallway, running around the goal during training, watching him and Basti practice their dance moves. All he had to do was catch Manuel's eyes for just a moment and suddenly, even if just for a second there was nothing else and all Manuel could do was wait for that night to come already.

The best part though, was that during the day, under sunlight or stadium lights, nothing has changed. They still shared playlists and bus seats and laughter and friendly hugs before games. And then later…

Later they would go into one of their rooms, they would close the door and shut out the outside world.

Even if the others have heard their moans, their giggles, saw the shared looks or the gentle seconds-long touches, even as they must have noticed Manuel's new attitude in training or Christoph's strongest drive whenever he and Manuel ended on the same training team - they haven't said anything.

But nor did Christoph and Manuel, not while in the dim light of hotel bedside lamps. There were "yes" and "good" and "more" and "please", there were deep looks and firm holds and long kisses. But Manuel refused to allow himself to think beyond that, and each time Christoph fell asleep cradled in his arms saying nothing but "thank you", he was more and more sure he was making the right decision.

And so it went on, and it was good, they did good together – as a team. And yet nothing could prepare them for what was about to come.

XXX

Seven-one. The dressing room was weirdly quite right after the whistle. Seven-one. They probably needed just a bit of time to realize this had actually happened.

Cause at the world cup you don't score seven goals, especially not past the group stage, and not against the host, not against such a huge football nation like Brazil.

Seven-one.

Maybe it was also the anticipation, knowing they had just put a huge target on themselves for the final. They won't be able to top that no matter what, other than winning the title which they all knew – they simply had to now.

It all changed as the coaches entered, Olli immediately shouting "what is wrong with you boys? You did it! You did it so well and you're going to win the world cup!"

That all it took really, someone to pop out the crock from the bottle of champagne and let it all pour and fizzle. The party continued throughout the night, induced by more beer and more champagne and the great relief of over-coming who was the natural favorite for the title.

Manuel was finding it hard to imagine how it would be like when, if, they actually win. Did they really have more in them to give? Could they really hold on, surpass the new very high expectation they have put for themselves?

"Whatever you're thinking, the answer is yes!" Christoph planted himself right next to him, hand resting on the small of Manuel's back.

"How do you know?" Manuel turned to him, big smile to match Christoph's.

"You were thinking about how much you wants me, right?" Christoph winked at him. The more Christoph did his weird awkward wink, the more Manuel found himself irresistible to them.

"So cheeky!" was his reply, whispered into Christoph's ear. He could almost kiss his neck right there, right under his ear where probably no one would notice. He pulled back, "but how is yes an answer to that?"

Christoph shrugged his shoulders, "just is." Looking right into each other's eyes, they both burst into loud rolling laughter.

"Come on!" Christoph stood and extended his hand towards Manuel, "we're dancing."

"I really don't…"

"Yes! We are. Come on!"

Christoph made his way to the big group of young men, all of them professional athletes, making thousands of euros a year, having their names printed in papers all over the world, just standing in circle, hands with beer bottles at their ends around each other, screaming the words of a rock anthem out of key.

He smiled at the knowledge that he was a part of it, and as Christoph turned to gesture him to come on and join them, he got a heavy breath stuck in his chest, and warmth that spread through him. He realized how lucky he felt to be able to see someone like Christoph enter this world, immerse himself in it. How proud he was to be one of those welcoming him in.

Grabbing a beer himself he made his way to the bouncing bunch of drunk teammates, he places his free arm around Christoph and pulled him close, as close as he could without breaking the circle.

 _"On days like these"_ they all screamed together, _"you wish it would never end"_. Manuel turned to look at Christoph, so happy, so loved by his teammates, so integrated into the team. It was almost as if Manuel was singing the words just for him.

XXX

It didn't end like that, of course it didn't. Their instincts lead them to Manuel's room, knowing the best thing would be to avoid the chance of being disturbed by an overly excited Thomas.  It started as usual, it started rushed and passionate. Each so eager to take his own clothes off.

Manuel sat on the bed, leaning back, waiting for Christoph to join him. And once he did, once he placed both knees at either side of Manuel's leg, watched him for a moment from above before bringing his lips down to meet the other, suddenly something changed.

Just as Christoph was pushing him down to lie on top of him, Manuel stopped. Something inside told him to. He couldn't put his finger on it, he could barely stand the look of disappointment, and worry, fear, on Christoph's face.

"No," he said with his hands caressing up and down the other's arms, "no, you did nothing wrong I just…. Not tonight ok?" Christoph nodded, and rose to put on his underpants, reaching out to pick his shirt and jeans from the corners of the room as well. He wasn't shy when he took out the condom, yet he tried his best to hide it from the other's eyes as he was placing it back in his pocket.

"Please stay, to sleep."

Christoph had paused for just a moment, hands holding tight to his jeans.

"Ok," he said and turned to look at Manuel, "I'll stay."

Manuel claimed up to the head of the bed, clearing Christoph’s side for him. Christoph's steps were small, careful, as if the last week didn't happen.

They fitted so well so quickly next to each other, sleep was already over taking Manuel.

"Manu?" Christoph's voice was weaker than anything Manuel has remembered, "I was ready you know. I mean, I am...”

"Shhhh," Manuel nuzzled the small space between neck and shoulder, "we still have all the time in the world"

Manuel couldn't have said anything else, he tightened his arms around Christoph and gently kissed the back of his head. He couldn't have said, 'yes, I know', couldn't have admitted to anyone that was why he had to stop.

XXX

Christoph was already fully dressed when Manuel woke up the next day, he was just about done with tying his shoe laces, and with his back still bend turned his smile towards Manuel to wish him good morning.

"I must go change to trainings gear."

"Yeah, of course." Manuel said through a yawn, robbing his eyes and fluffing the blankets a bit.

Christoph stood up and came to give Manuel the quickest of kisses on his lips. He didn't say everything was fine between them, he didn't have to. Manuel was thankful about his courtesy to act as if nothing at all had happened.

Or maybe it wasn't courtesy, maybe Christoph wasn't making an effort. Was that what it was from the start? Easy, natural, free.

Christoph was disarming Manuel, unintentionally yet willingly, and he couldn't be holding on for much longer.


	5. chapter 5

Unbelievable. There were no words, couldn't possibly be other words, to describe that moment. In Manuel's mind he was standing there, in the middle of the Maracana, a camera with a low angle and just a bit of a tilt up going around him, round and round as he soaks up the atmosphere of that moment. If he could, he would bottle it, put in a jar and place it on his fireplace labeled, "the smell of the air at the happiest moment of my life".

He didn't know who to go to first, he wanted to hug all of them. Benni, who they both waited so long for him to be a part of the senior team, and has now proved himself beyond doubt; Mario who had delivered this dream to them, who's talent he was used to appreciating every single day yet it still surprised him. To Bastian, the one who fought harder than anyone else, who cared more than anyone else, and earned this moment more than anyone else. To Jogi, to Per, to Klose.

They were all just a sea of people in white shirts, wherever you turned there was someone there to hug you and congratulate you. Christoph was just another one of them, their eyes locked and Manuel took him into his arms.

"We did it" Manuel said, "we did it!"

He pulled back, his hands still supporting Christoph's back as they shared a smile. Unnoticed to the others, they were both taken back 3 hours, to when they set in the dressing room and heard the news – Khedira is injured, Kramer is starting.

Chrisoph had nodded, what else could he have done at that time. They were about to head to line up in the tunnel, and they all went to him, wanted to talk, unaware it was just making Christoph more nervous. Manuel had noticed though. Manuel had made sure to be the first to get to him.

"Remember the beach?" he had asked, "Remember what I said?"

Yes, Christoph nodded. Yes, he remembers, and he had known from the look on Manuel's face then, and now, and during all those nights and those bus rides and the training together, he knows he meant it.

Manuel had moved in it to hug him "we'll do it" he said, "we'll do it."

Now back in his arms, Manuel could sense Christoph was still shocked. He was not sure if it was because of his injury, or was it just because that moment simply too unbelievable. Manuel was about to ask Christoph if he's ok, but it was time for him to go get an award he did not want or need. For that precise moment, the golden glove meant nothing if it required having to let go of Christoph.

Xxx

Later, Manuel almost managed to ask Christoph if he was ok as they were lining up to accept the medals, the trophy. He was beaming of happiness, and Manuel was unable to find words, a way to show his care without ruining how complete everything seemed to be. He stepped behind Christoph, hoping the touch of his hand on the other's back was reassuring, and kept it there as long as it was possible.

However, soon enough Manuel found himself drowned in the atmosphere, the joined feeling of proud and pure happiness at the end of a hard fought battle. It didn't even matter who was standing next to you, who was putting their arms around your shoulder, jumping with you, singing, shouting.

They were a team, _the team_. And they did it.

They all gathered on the small platform, waiting for Philip to come and lift the cup. Their chants were synchronizing in anticipation. Manuel felt someone bump into his back, nearly making him fall over, he felt the rolling laughter before he heard it. Manuel could tell who he was even among the mayhem around them.

He turned to take Christoph into his arms again.

"We did it!" Christoph shouted into his ear, and Manuel had to laugh as well.

"Yeah, welcome! Great to have you on board!" Christoph leaned it and quickly kissed Manuel's cheek. "I was afraid your head was still hurting."

"No, it's fine," their hands seemed to unable to find any rest, they kept bumping into each other, hanging on the rails, grasping at each other's,  resting on hips, "I just wish I could remember, maybe one day, what it was like to be on the pitch"

"Yeah," was all Manuel said in reply, his hands still wrapped around the other boy.

"But you know what?" Christoph's face was so close, Manuel could feel his warm breath, and maybe just a feathered touch of lips on his skin, "this is what's important, that I remember tonight, everything that happens."

Manuel's smile was too wide to be wicked, "you mean here now or back at the hotel?"

"Both," Christoph shouted into his ear. In unison they both started laughing, breaking away from each other not before Christoph playfully and softly slapped the side of Manuel's neck.

The kept spending the celebration next to each other. Christoph's hand on Manuel's back as he lifted the cup, sitting next to each other waiting for the fans to join in, in the locker room, side by side nearly everywhere they went.

The conversation they had up there, on the stand, kept ringing in Manuel's ears. He understood what he had promised, and he couldn't keep the smile off his face.

Xxx

Jogi gave them just one order: tomorrow morning at 10am be on the bus. Other than that, go party or go to sleep - doesn't matter. But we have a plane to catch – we are bringing the world cup home!

Everyone cheered! Glasses rose up in the air and hands clapped. Manuel was getting drunker, high now on alcohol as well as emotions. And Christoph smile was always in front of him. No matter where he turned, there it was and each time his heart notably skipped a beat.

"Come on," he said eventually, pulling Christoph away from what seemed to be an engaging conversation with Julian and Mathias.

"Manu," Christoph wined, playful and blissful, being dragged out of the room, across the hall "it's still early."

"Not enough," Manuel's voice was full of air, as if there was an ache inside of him he had to calm, to ease, "never early enough. God Chris…"

Manuel just barely gave Christoph time to steady himself as he stopped walking. He pinned him up against the wall, not caring who might see them. He was so happy;  so happy from the start: getting to Brazil, getting to know Christoph, being hailed again and again as the best keeper, winning a game, and then another, winning the world cup…

After this month he was starting to think there was no a limit to how much happy he is able to feel, to experience.

Manuel can't remember the last time he was so deeply invested in a kiss. With eyes closed, all his other senses were completely taken over by the sounds and smells and taste and feel of Christoph being so close to him yet again. There was nowhere else he wished to be at the moment, no matter what was happening back at the party.

Christoph hummed into the kiss, not breaking the connection, hand pressing Manuel's face close, closer.  Manuel was sure his legs would give in, his heart might stop, and his whole world around him would spin from the lack of oxygen.

He had no choice but to stop, resting his forehead against the one just slightly under his.

"Your room?" Christoph voice was weak and full of air, "mine?"  Manuel's was even weaker, he wasn't even sure he could say yes through his heavy pants. There was no need to say anything though. Hand in hand they were rushing, nearly running, to Christoph's bed, the nearest one.  

Manuel felt like a teenager again, like he didn't just win the most important title for any footballer but rather the under-17 regional championship. That was the first real title he ever won, and afterwards the celebration was immersed in the hope-filled knowledge it was so very unlikely to be his last.

"Hi, come back to me." Christoph voice and gentle strokes called to him. "You made me so very happy tonight; you had just as big a part as Mario in us the title. And I can't believe I get to be the one to make you happy tonight." Abruptly he pulled back from nuzzling Manuel's neck between words. "I mean, I hope I that I am… that I do…"

"Yes" Manuel giggled, staring deep into Christoph's sparkling eyes and already leading him to the bed with paced small steps. "So very happy Chris. I want this, really. And, I hope you too, cause despite how much, I don't even want to hurt you. I couldn't stand it if you…"

Christoph grabbed Manuel's shirt tightly with both fists and landed them both on the bed with a sounded thud. He was sure that and the kiss that followed would be enough of an answer for Manuel, and he broke it just so he can reach for his bag and bring with him the condoms and lube.

"Say yes Chris, please," Manuel begged, voice full of need and just a hitch of desperation.  

"Yes Manu," Christoph kissed his check. "Yes," he moved down to his neck, "yes" collar bone, "yes" he took a nipple into his mouth, and Manuel's opened at the sight and sense, letting out a sigh of pleasure and anticipation.

There were no more words needed between them. It was exactly as Manuel needed, wanted, expected. From that start it had delighted him how Christoph's easiness and matureness followed him to the bedroom. He hadn't made love, in the full real deep sense of these words, in so many years. And while this wasn't it (it couldn't have been), every new part of his skin covered by Christoph's lips and fingers made him long to have it again more than even before.

Manuel hoped Christoph would be unable to see how nervous he was, because he was supposed to be the one to calm down the younger man under him. Yes Christoph was the one gently stroking up and down Manuel's arms, coming up to leave small, quick and yet forceful kisses all over his skin, his lips. He held his gaze even as Manuel entered him.

Manuel couldn't tare his eyes away. Christoph eyes shut, his head thrown back, heavy breathes and voiced pants. It must have hurt; Christoph told him it has been a while since his last time. But his quiet hisses encouraged Manuel on, his face gave away nothing but pleasure, his mouth pure happiness and his eyes, now coming back to stare straight into the ones above, demanded more.

Yet Manuel was the one begging, nibbling his collar bone and then burying cries in Christoph’s neck. There were more words on his lips, but he hardly had enough air to breath out "please Chris, please." Christoph simply answered him with a smile, same smile as before, same smile as so many days ago, when they were still nothing but teammates getting to know each other. The blue eyes remained focused even as damp stared gathering on their edges.

It was all too much. Manuel was sure he could still feel the medal hanging from his neck, the weight of the gold pushing him down, crushing his lips, his abs, his torso, him all onto Christoph. He could still hear the crowd cheering them in Christoph's moans, could still see the stars in the southern night sky reflect a shine in his eyes. And Manuel could feel those eyes still fixed on him as he closed his own eyes and came, Christoph joining him not long after.

And after, Christoph cuddled up to him, somehow being able to fit himself into every curve of Manuel's body. And this time Manuel did not resist his urge, and simply kissed Christoph forehead just as he was falling asleep.

 

XXX

Manuel woke up with those words still on is lips. Spread out on his stomach, head so heavily resting on the pillow he is sure there would be marks on his cheek, his eyes lids were  barely open against the sunlight coming out of the window, yet as he looked up he could clearly see blue eyes shining just as brightly, looking down at him

Christoph must have been up for a while. His back against the headboard, such a fresh smile on his face. Leaning down, he murmured, "good morning" and lazily pecked Manuel's sleepy month before getting up from the bed. Manuel suddenly noticed how long his limbs are, how it can seem like he doesn't fully control them, like a kid still getting used to his body.

Christoph gathered his clothes from wherever they ended up the night before. Finding his underwear last. He was either oblivious or simply did not care that Manuel has been watching him all along.

"Hi," Manuel's voice was still deep, muscles not fully awake to pop up a smile, "you don't regret last night, do you?"

Christoph was preoccupied with putting on his jeans, the smile he shot at Manuel seemed lazy yet genuine. So natural, so easy, it sent Manuel's head spinning from more than the hangover. "Why would I be?"

Christoph continued dressing, his shirt next, and Manuel head dropped back on to the pillow, this time flat on his back, staring at the ceiling, arms on both sides. He tried to gather his thought, inside of him so many feeling had formed an untangled-able yarn ball. It was pride and accomplishment and delight and relief… which were all linked to each other yet not the same. 

"Know what?" Christoph jumped on to the empty space next took, his face so boyish, such a grin lighting up his face, and apparently he forgot to put his shirt on after all. Manuel's fingers tangled themselves in his hair so he could avoid his eyes even for just a moment, "it's 8:45, if we're quick, we can make it."

Christoph's did not wait for a reply, each thigh was already on either side of Manuel. Manuel pulled him down towards him, and Christoph's obliged, his body aligning with Manuel's, yet he stopped just a moment before every inch of his would touch the other.

"We won't make it if you keep teasing me."

Christoph didn't join his giggles, his eyes went up and down the body he got to know so well in the past couple of weeks, down and up again, as if he needed to memorize it.

"This isn't the last time" Manuel whispered into his ear and used all his strength to pull him down, slamming their bodies and hardness into each other, refusing to give either of them time to dwell on his promise.

Xxx

They took their sit next to each other on the bus, they shared headphones as they sleet on the plane, under the blanket converging them. Manuel rested his hand over the small spot of skin exposed when Christoph's shirt rose up. Shyly he smile to himself when he realized how right he was last night – there could always be a new high of bliss waiting for him to reach it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading! I'd appreciate any comments or suggestions you may have. 
> 
> This is a great pairing to write! I will be posting a new story very soon.


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